Key Characteristics of Enneatype 4
Self-Conscious, Sensitive, Honest, Reserved, Creative, Intense, Different, Individual, Expressive, Bohemian, Romantic, Emotional, Melodramatic, Self-Absorbed, Temperamental, Disappointed, Depressive, Vulnerable, Victim, Long-Suffering, Self-Pity, Inferior, Deficient.
General Description
Fours lack their true sense of ‘beingness’, so they try to emulate it by being seen as individual, original and authentic. Their disconnect from true ‘being’ means that Fours often feel isolated, lonely and disconnected from others. They are highly sensitive to abandonment and neglect, and seem to suffer more than most, so they tend to dramatise their emotions and wallow in melancholic self-pity. They are often dissatisfied with their lot in life, believing that other people seem to have the qualities that they lack. Some Fours exude sadness and despair, while others seem happy enough, but there is always a degree of underlying dissatisfaction and despondency.
The Three Sub-Types (or variants)
Self-Preservation Fours
- Countertype – Can look like Ones or Twos.
- Independent, creative and sensitive, but often internalise their emotions.
- Unlike other Fours, this countertype doesn’t express their suffering so much, because they have learned to bear their pain without self-pity.
- Envy motivates them to work hard to get what other have and they lack.
- They are stoic, strong and can endure a lot, so sometimes put themselves in challenging situations.
- They are empathic, nurturing, humanitarian and will stand up for the underdog.
- They would benefit from sharing their true feelings more, and being more light-hearted and easy-going on themselves.
Sexual Fours
- Can look like Threes or Eights.
- Dramatic, creative and highly-strung, but can feel inferior and misunderstood.
- They are intense and demanding but can also turn on the charm to attract what they want.
- They are assertive and outspoken, and can become angry to avoid feeling their painful deeper emotions.
- They sometimes make others suffer because they have suffered enough and want to even things out.
- They can be envious, competitive and arrogant, and would rather feel superior than present a good image to others.
- They would benefit from learning to be with their own suffering without projecting it onto others, and getting in touch with the true feelings that underlie their anger.
Social Fours
- Emotionally over-sensitive; they feel deeply, suffer a lot and look to others to rescue them.
- Their suffering makes them feel unique, and they love telling others about it to attract sympathy and admiration.
- They have a deep desire to be understood for who they really are, but often get caught up in their own negativity which triggers shame and envy.
- Their sub-conscious sense of inferiority is so strong that they often put themselves down and turn on themselves, even to the extent of sub-consciously manifesting ill-health.
- They are ashamed of sexuality, anger and expressing their wants and needs.
- They would benefit from working on their inferiority complex to become more self-reliant and develop more self-esteem.
Further Information About Enneatype 4
Evolutionary Behaviours
(when safe and relaxed)
- Fours become more objective and principled, like healthy Ones.
- Fours become more empathic and interpersonal, like healthy Twos.
Devolutionary Behaviours
(when stressed)
- Fours become overinvolved and clingy, like unhealthy Twos.
- Fours become critical and frustrated, like unhealthy Ones.
Fours with a Three Wing
Fours with a Five Wing
General Advice for Fours
- Acknowledge your desire for special treatment and don’t expect your friends to be your emotional dumping ground.
- Remember that your personal feelings are not objective facts, so they don’t provide accurate information about other peoples’ motives.
- Recognise that moodiness isn’t a sign of sensitivity; it is a sign that your heart is shut down and you are avoiding your deeper emotions.
- Be more positive, constructive and pro-active, and create routines that take you out of your melancholic comfort zone.
Core Beliefs & Strategies of Enneatype 4
Lost Essential Quality: True-Self (The Point)
The Point is our true-Self; our true identity; our true being; our uniquely individual qualities, value and purpose.
Mental Ideal (Holy Idea): Original Nature
The mind’s sense of the lost essential quality – the inherent originality and individuality of our original nature (true-Self).
Emotional Ideal (Virtue): Equanimity
The heart’s sense of the lost essential quality – the emotional balance that comes from being our true-Self.
Core Belief: I am Invisible / Don’t Exist / Point-less
The loss of the essential quality (true-Self), the mental ideal (original nature) and the emotional ideal (equanimity) contribute to the development a core belief of being invisible and irrelevant.
Core Motivation (to disprove the core belief): To be Significant / Special / Unique
In an attempt to correct the core belief (invisible) and to reconnect with the essential quality (true-Self), the mental ideal (original nature) and the emotional ideal (equanimity), Fours develop a strong desire to be unique and special. They want to be significant and recognised for their unique identity.
Mental Strategy (Fixation): Fantasising / Longing
The ego-mind doesn’t see the unique true-Self, so it fantasises about who we might have been and longs for what might have been.
Emotional Strategy (Passion): Envy
The felt sense of envy that arises as a result of the longing and fantasies.
Ego Ideal (what we aspire to be): To be Sensitive, Creative and Unique
The ego-ideal (to be unique) is an aspirational idealised idea of ourself that incorporates the lost essential quality (True-Self).